The relationship to nudity: a question of culture and mores
Certain African or Amazonian populations live almost naked. They follow ancestral customs and rites, sometimes thousands of years old. There is therefore no reason to call into question the mechanisms originating from societies which have been built on these models.
In Western countries, and more particularly in France, it was not until the 1960s and sexual liberation that many adults walked around naked in front of others, including children. Sexual freedom, the liberation of bodies were demanded. In short, bourgeois modesty, the obstacles were thrown into oblivion, freedom in all its forms, displayed. Around the same time nudist clubs appeared where nudity was seen as a liberation, sometimes as the source of a new well-being.
The child from 1 year to adolescence: advocacy for modesty
When taking a bath with their infant, each parent was able to taste the hand-to-hand contact with their child, in a very intense moment of fusion where the toddler becomes one with his parent. The child finds amniotic fluid in the bath water; he is immersed in the peacefulness of his gestation. This rejuvenating moment for the child can soothe him and allow him to rediscover, during a bath, his moments of symbiosis lost with his coming into the world.
On the other hand, as soon as he ceases to be a baby, when the child begins to walk, the adult must take physical distance: the child has a body, the parent has a body; they are no longer in fusion, but constitute two distinct beings. This distinction allows the child to develop without having to undergo the visual and proxemic intrusion of the body of his parents.
Seduction and disgust
Around five years old, the child will try to seduce the parent of the opposite sex. He will naturally try to find out what his parents' bodies look like. He will often, and this is normal, gestures like touching his mother's breasts or trying to see what his father's and mother's sex looks like.
This curiosity must have as an answer that the sex of the adult is of the order of the intimate and cannot be seen by the children for the reasons which I will develop…
For adults, their genitalia pose no problem; walking around naked is rather often the sign of freedom and a certain zenitude. But they never put themselves in the children's shoes. And if we place ourselves from the point of view of a child, the genitals are seen from below, and appear of an enormous size and a certain ugliness, for the child.
My analysands who lived with parents who had this attitude speak of it with all the more disgust because they had the feeling of undergoing this vision which they were not in a position to refuse. Sometimes they say they have been in the grip of a very strong excitement, with stimuli exceeding their capacity for integration, creating a trauma.
Who am I, who will I become?
For a child, growing up means becoming a person distinct from others. The parent who imposes on his child the vision of his private parts is at the origin of a visual aggression crushing the child and burdening his capacities to become a balanced adult.
How can a little boy be built who is given to see his father's penis, so big while his is all ridiculous? How can a little girl build herself when her mother shows her a hairy pubis and lips that seem enormous, when she sees none of this in her?
The child wonders, feels devalued. How will he be able to develop healthily in the face of this oversized parental image?
This invasion will make it very difficult for them to know who they are because unconsciously the image of the adult parental sex will be mixed with their not yet formed, generating a trauma that will burden the child's ability to become a balanced adult.
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